Tag Archives: asos

Sam’s Women: The Best Friend, Part II

When we left off in yesterday’s Part I post, Sam was trying to warn Diane that her old friend Heather was hitting on him: “Listen, sweetheart, I didn’t want to have to tell you this, because you’re pals and all that, but she’s coming onto me, gangbusters. And I’ll tell you something else. I need a little help here because I don’t have that much experience saying no to women. The closest I’ve ever gotten is: ‘Not now, we’re landing.'”

But Diane doesn’t believe him, so she invites them both over for dinner. But when Heather pulls out all the stops with her next outfit, Diane starts to falter.

Heather: “Well, what do you think about this dress? I just bought it today. I saw it and I just had to have it.”
Diane: “Why did you buy a dress today of all days? You come into the bar, you meet…everyone, and you go out and get a ‘come-get-me dress.’ Explain yourself.”

In the words of a man in the 80s, she looks like a stone cold fox:

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A few newer dresses and pumps that fit the bill:

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1. Dagmar Majorelle Tunic Dress. 2. ASOS T-Shirt Dress with Embellished Shoulder Detail. 3. Corpus Acid Wash Sleeveless Shirtdress. 4. Helmut Lang Slack Drape Panel Dress. 5. Seduce Geo Enamel Earrings. 6. Stella McCartney Cherubina Heavyweight Jersey Dress. 7. By Malene Birgir Silk Satin-Trimmed Woven Dress. 8. Charles by Charles David Pinot in Sepia Combo. 9. Maison Martin Margiela Stacked Cyldiner-Heel Sandal. 10. Jason Wu Short Sleeve Dress in Moss Green.

And finally, the scene in which Diane loses her cool, thankfully captured and uploaded on YouTube by some other Cheers fanatic:

Here’s to Sam’s Women!

Cheers,

Chloe

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S2E10: Diane’s DTR Outfit

In Episode 10 of Season 2, “How Do I Love Thee? Let Me Call You Back,” Sam and Diane dance circles around the eternal dating question: “What are we doing” aka “Where are we going?” aka “Do you love me?” (of course, it’s Diane’s idea to discuss it in the first place). In one of the rare times that we see Diane’s unbottoned side, if you will, Sam goes to Diane’s apartment to find her a few wine bottles deep.

Sam: “Wow! You’re drunk!”
Diane: “Wow! You’re stupid! I’ll be sober in the morning.”
Sam: “You’re upset about my not thinking about our relationship. I will start thinking about our relationship. Maybe we should take some time off, not see each other for a while. That way I’ll just have one thing on my mind the whole time.”
Diane: “That’s one more than you usually have.”

After pointing out his lack of intelligence a few more times, they decide to meet back up in a week and have the talk. The DTR (“Define the Relationship”), as my friends and I have always called it. Throughout the episode Diane wears a few short-sleeve knit sweaters.

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Of course, Sam mucks the whole thing up because he keeps choking on the word “love.” If you’ve dated a dude in San Francisco, this might sound familiar:

Sam: “Obviously the only reason that I’m with you is that I luh–”
Diane: “What, Sam?”
Sam: “I said the reason that I’m with you is that I luh.”
Diane: “You luh?”
Sam: “You know what I mean.”
Diane: “Well what’s the matter? Can’t you say it?”
Sam: “Of course I can. I luh–I luh–I luh.”

But of course it ends wtih a Carla Tortelli gem.

Diane, gushing: “Hey everybody! Sam can’t say he loves me!”
Carla: “Who can?”

Just go watch it on Netflix already. Here is Dian’es wonderfully un-Diane outfit: chunky sweater, grey pleated bomber jacket, and drawstring pants. So good.

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And a few modern options:

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1. Iro Fabiola Biker Jacket. 2. Yoon Colorblock Sailing Sweater, Anthropologie. 3. sir sir by correll correll Alva Chrome Top, Anthropologie. 4. Marc by Marc Jacobs Anarchy Striped Cotton-Blend Sweater. 5. Paige Drawstring Trouser. 6. Sparrow Sunstrip Pullover, Anthropologie. 7. Paul & Joe Argovie Cotton-Blend Honeycomb-Knit Sweater.

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S2: Diane, Pearls

Diane may have lost her sizeable inheritance and become a cocktail waitress, but she never lost her haughty airs. Wanting to look like an overeducated tennis-club-frequenting blue-blooded aristocrat, Diane’s jewelry of choice is, of course, a pearl necklace.

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Now, I am not a Jew of the JAP (Jewish American Princess) variety. My car has a salvage title, my favorite clothes are from Salvation Army, and I haven’t had a manicure since I went to prom. Don’t get me wrong: I’m spoiled and I won’t take public transportation, I’m just not really a pearls kind of girl. I did receive a few sets of classic pearls for my Bat Mitzvah fifteen years ago, but I’m pretty sure I’ve never worn them. Here are a few more modern alternatives that I would wear. If I had to wear pearls.

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Clockwise from top left:

1. Ligia Dias Pendu Necklace. 2. Chan Luu Pearl Tassel Necklace. 3. Lisa Freede Chain & Pearl Necklace. 4. Florian Double Bead Necklace. 5. Sweet Child Pearl Necklace. 6. Dogeared Pearls of Friendship on Gold Silk Thread Necklace. 7. Lizzie Fortunato Sacred Valley Necklace. 8. ASOS Limited Edition Pearl Glasses Necklace.

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Sam’s Women: The Distraction

Season 1, Episode 21: Diane is being wined and dined by Sam’s impressive brother, Derek. After Sam mopes around, unwilling to reveal that he’s jealous, Carla gets fed up.

Carla: You know something, Sam? I used to admire you. But you know what’s happened to you ever since she got here? You’ve turned into a big weenie! You’re a dink, a wimp, a fred, a loser!

So, in the beginning of Episode 22, Sam returns from a night on the town with this stunner (to whom he says “I’m sorry I shrieked the wrong name.”). Carla is relieved that Sam has gotten back on the horse, so to speak.

Carla: Sam I’m proud of you. You took my little wimp speech to heart. It’s great to see you back in action again!
Sam: Yea, I wanna thank you for that. Took my mind of my brother and your skinny co-worker. I don’t care where they are anymore…where are they?
Carla: Well Bobby and Suzy saw them at the drive-in sharing a cherry coke and fries (rolling her eyes).

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It’s a little hard to see, but the gorgeous distraction is wearing an incredible fringed sweater. Luckily, some fine brands are making uncannily similar ones today. And if you don’t want the whole sweater fringed, slap this fringe collar over any old sweater to spruce it up.

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1. BB Dakota Zowie Sweater. 2. Staring at Stars Fringe Sweater. 3. Isabel Marant Fringe Sweater. 4. Scotch & Soda Bohemian Tape Yarn Sweater with Fringing. 5. Daydream Nation Fringe String Color Triangle Collar. 6. Rebecca Taylor Fringe Mesh Pullover. 7. Isabel Marant Yoan Sweater. 8. Pixie Mart Diamond Fringe Sweater. 9. ASOS Fringed Sweater.

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S1E19: Carla, Hawaiian Prints

One of my all-time favorites (again). Having grown up on Kauai, I am biased towards anything in Hawaiian print, the kitchier the better. So this look is right up my alley.

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(In the bottom picture, Carla is hanging out at the bar watching Diane reading a bartending manual and laboriously attempting to make a Bloody Mary from scratch. Sam asks Carla why she’s torturing Diane, pointing out to the poor old sap that they have Bloody Mary mix in the refrigerator. Carla replies, “I wanted to see her try to make vodka.”)

An assortment of modern Hawaiian prints:

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1. Maarten Van Der Horst for Lulu & Co Ruffle Back Mini Skirt. 2. Maarten Van Der Horst for Lulu & Co Ruffle Back Shirt. 3. Equipment Leandra Hawaiian Stripe Silk Shirt. 4. Ganni Shirt in Palm Print. 5. Preview: Vans “Aloha Camo” Authentic and Chukka Boot for Spring/Summer 2013. 6. Full Tilt Ambrosia Sunglasses. 7. Ganni Pants in Palm Print. 8. Therapy Tropical Bralet. 9. Karen Walker Hawaiian Cuff Shorts. 10. ASOS Hawaiian High Waisted Denim Knicker Shorts. 11. Warehouse Hula Floral Tie Front Shirt.

And, in honor of Carla’s visor (yes, she can even make visors look good!), some Hawaiian-print hats (you’ll need to use eBay for these):

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Clockwise from bottom left: 1. Huf Hawaiian Print 5 Panel Camp Cap from Summer 2012. 2. Karen Walker floral hat look from Spring 2012 runway. 3. Supreme Floral Suede Camp Cap from Spring/Sumer 2012. 4. Norse Projects Hektor Hawaii Cap from Winter 2011. 5. Brixton Henshaw Luau Hat (available at Oakland Surf Club).

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S1E13: Sam Malone, Feminized

In Season 1, Episode 13, it isn’t Carla or Diane who has the best outfit. It’s Sam.

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Wide-leg denim trousers, pink plaid shirt, boat shoes, and a bomber jacket. Sometimes you gotta borrow from the boys. Sam Malone, feminized:

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1. J. Crew Boy Shirt in Mint Strawberry Plaid. 2. Bed Stu Aunt Blanche Boat Shoes. 3. Henry & Belle Sailor Jean. 4. ASOS Leather Bomber Jacket.

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In Honor of Valentine’s Day Part II: Maternity Wear, Carla-Style

Happy Valentine’s Day, all! Did you know that on average, 11,000 babies are conceived each year on Valentine’s Day? (That’s in part because of silly things like the lingerie featured in the last post). In honor of that, let’s take a look at Carla’s many maternity outfits.

When Cheers begins, Carla Tortelli has four children. By the end of the series, she has eight. The first pregnancy occurs in Season 1, when Carla is knocked up by her smarmy ex-husband Nick.

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Diane: Carla, I don’t think you should be engaging in strenuous activities when you are with child.
Carla: If I didn’t do things with child, I’d never leave the house. The only thing I ever did without child resulted in one.

-from S3E14

Of course I love Carla’s maternity wear, but for those who want to look less like a pregnant lady in a dive bar, Mama NYC, Hatch, and Asos make some beautiful pieces:

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1. ASOS Maternity Midi Body Conscious Dress in Floral. 2. Hatch Night Out Leggings. 3. Hatch Cape. 4. ASOS Maternity Swing Dress in Floral. 5. Mama NYC Laura Shirt. 6. Mama NYC Kathryn Dress. 7. Mama NYC Maggie Vest. 8. Hatch Sweatshirt Dress. 9. ASOS Maternity Blouse with Peter Pan Collar and Balloon Sleeve. 10. Hatch Boyfriend Sweater.

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Sam’s Women: The Nerd

In Season 1, Episode 6, Diane’s nerdy friend from college, Rebecca, comes to town “vulnerable and looking for a man to give her an afternoon of unbridled passion.” Even with her granny glasses and goody-goody blouse, Sam doesn’t discriminate.

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Get the look with vintage frames and neck-bow button-ups.

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1. Cazal Vintage Glasses at Farfetch. 2. Oasis Pussy Bow Check Shirt. 3. River Island Dolly Shirt at Asos.

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S1E9: Carla, Oxblood and…Piglet?

I keep saying that each new Carla outfit is my favorite, but this one’s modern alternatives are so darling, I can’t help it. It’s my favorite.

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If the color of these sweaters is known as oxblood, then the color of the blouses must be…piglet. And yes, that is a leather t-shirt.

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1. Topshop Textured Knit Sweater. 2. ASOS Leather T-Shirt. 3. Forever 21 Pointed Collar Chiffon Shirt in Peach/Hot Pink. 4. Acne Patti Tape Pink.

As a longtime vegan and sister to Ruby Roth, author and illustrator of “That’s Why We Don’t Eat Animals,” there are a million things wrong with this post. First, I love the leather shirt. I’m sorry! It’s incredible. It’s not like I’m personally buying or selling it, nor did I invent the color name “oxblood,” nor did I refer to the pink color as pork chop (though I did used to watch reruns of Shari Lewis and Lamb Chop as a child), but rather “piglet.” But I digress. Don’t buy the shirt. Or do, I might get a commission. But really, don’t. Do it. Don’t do it…

(I do realize that there is much hypocrisy present here, seeing as I have, and probably will continue to, post leather shoes. There’s just something about it being on a shirt that makes it more…leathery. And I’ll leave it at that, as I’ve now probably lost any readers I had by mentioning the word “vegan.”)

Here’s to the ever-present issue of fashion’s moral compass!

Cheers,

Chloe, lapsed vegan, traitor to my love of cows, soon-to-be-recipient of my sister’s scorn

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Valentine’s Day: Carla vs. Diane

It’s easy to imagine what Diane Chambers – the eternal optimist, the feminine lace-and-puff-sleeve-loving, purple-and-pink-wearing aspiring poetess, the highfalutin Shakespeare-reading romantic – might wear on Valentine’s day (if she could ever get her unrequited love Sam Malone to commit).

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Diane tends towards the delicate, the pastel, the classic black and white – anything to draw Sam’s attention away from the common hussy at the bar and towards her more refined (read: stuffy), hard-to-get (read: frigid), subtle (read: prudish) ways.

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1. Rachel Comey Loveless Atlat Top.  2. Dior Junior Vintage Round Sunglasses.  3. Equipment Femme Mina Black/Nude Heart Print Sleeveless Shirt.  4. Anya Hindmarch Joss Heart Studded Purse.  5. Moschino Vintage Heart Dress.  6. Robert Clergerie Jonas Loafer.  7. Vanrycke Heart Necklace.  8. Forever 21 Heart Print Scarf.  9. Asos Peplum Dress in Heart Print.

On the other hand, there’s Carla Tortelli – the eternal pessimist, the diehard Boston Red Sox fan, the aggressive and foul-mouthed single mother of four (or five or six…I know she ends up with eight but to which season each pregnancy belongs is a bit hazy), the Nike-wearing tomboy. What might she have worn on Valentine’s day if any of the three fathers of her raggamuffin brood showed up with flowers in hand?

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Find Carla a Valentine’s Day-themed sneaker, sweatshirt, hair clip, diaper bag, or a heart-shaped ring that could leave a dent in a rude customer’s face, and she might just be willing to play along.

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1. Vintage Needlepoint Hearts Vans (This is the real thing. Carla might actually have worn these on the show. Ebay will be your best bet to find ones like these).  2. Chinti and Parker Heart Sweater.  3. Moschino Round Frame Sunglasses.  4. Tobi Meeting Hearts Ring.  5. ban.do Cross My Heart Gold Plated Bobbi Pin.  6. Two-Sided Heart Tote.  7. Lauren Moffatt Love Pocket Top.

Here’s to Sam and Diane, Carla and…well, whoever can afford a dinner for two!

Cheers,

Chloe

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S1E6: Carla, Dual Stripes

Season 1, Episode 6. Carla is wearing one of the most incredible shirts ever. Maybe that’s a bit hyperbolic but, it’s good. Real good:

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Dual stripes! And if you notice her right shoulder in the top photo, you can see that the back of the shirt is the opposite–AMAZING. I don’t know anything about football, and am eternally grateful that I will be on an airplane during the Super Bowl and its ensuing hysteria (read: rioting) in San Francisco, but admittedly, she looks almost like a (very well-dressed) referee. So I say, reluctantly, Go 49ers?

I thought this look would be impossible to replicate. Thankfully, ASOS, Antipodium, and House of Holland see the merit in mixed stripe patterns:

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1. ASOS Top with Spots and Stripes.  2. House of Holland V Stripe Oversized T-Shirt.  3. Antipodium Syntax T-Shirt in Patchwork Stripe.  4. Nasty Gal Straight Up Blouse.  5. Antipodium Syntax Striped Tee.  6. Marni Stripe Shopping Bag.  7. ASOS Shirt in Cutabout Stripe Print.  8. Theory ‘Caslyn’ Cotton Skort.  9. House of Holland Striped Denim Skirt.  10. Marni Stripe Silk Twill Top.

And yes, that’s a skort on the bottom left. Like most trends of the 80s and 90s, I am a proponent of bringing them back. Clearly.

Here’s to dual stripes. And the 49ers. I guess.

Cheers,

Chloe

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